Listener
Transkript
Listener
Verbal Communication Skills Based on the presentation of Tom Atkinson, Boğaziçi University, May 6, 2004 Some minor additions by Dr. Enis Karaarslan, Muğla University Computer Engineering Department, March 2014 Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Communication Skills Overview Effective communication skills are a critical element in your career and personal lives. We all must use a variety of communication techniques to both understand and be understood. Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Most common ways to communicate king a e p S Writing Boğazıçı University ge s a m al I u s i V Bod y Lan gua ge Tom Atkinson Communication Goals To change behavior To get and give Information To persuade To get action To ensure understanding Source: CGAP Direct Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Critical success factor for life The majority of your perceived ability comes from how you communicate 30% What you know 70% How you communicate it Source: CGAP Direct Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Listening Skills Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson ” İletişimin 4 unsurundan (Okuma , yazma , konuşma ve dinleme) biri olan dinleme, hak ettiği dikkati ve önemi görmemektedir. Bize okumayı, yazmayı profesyonel eğitimciler öğretti . Konuşmayı öğrenirken de ailede herkes seferber oldu . Fakat hiç kimse etkin dinlemenin nasıl olacağını öğretmedi.” [1] Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson “Etkin/etkili dinleme sadece söylenilenleri duymak değil, aynı zamanda bu söylenenleri önemli bulmak, kavramak ve değerlendirmektir.” [2] Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Agenda 1. 2. 3. Motivation How to Listen Paraphrasing, Summarizing and Questioning Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Part 1 Motivation Session Objectives Be able to: Describe reasons that communication fails List strategies to improve communication Paraphrase (izah etmek – yorumlamak) and summarize conversations Use appropriate questioning techniques Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Listening and Speaking are used a lot… 50% 45% 45% 40% 35% 30% 30% 25% 20% 16% 15% 10% 9% 5% 0% Boğazıçı University Writing Reading SpeakingTom Atkinson Listening … But not taught enough 50% 45% 40% 35% 45% Am ou nt tau g 30% ht 30% 25% 20% 16% 15% 10% 9% 5% 0% Boğazıçı University Writing Reading SpeakingTom Atkinson Listening Listening is needed everywhere… Listening skills form the basis of: Continued learning Teamwork skills Management skills Negotiation skills Emotional intelligence Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson … But not practiced effectively 70% of all communication is Misunderstood Misinterpreted Rejected Distorted (çarpıtılmış) Not heard Source: CGAP Direct Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Further Reading (Turkish) Etkin dinleme (active listening) nedir ve nasıl yapılır http://enisden.wordpress.com/2011/04/12/etkin-dinle me-active-listening-nedir-ve-nasil-yapilir/ Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Part 2 How to Listen “Harry always was a poor listener.” What if communication were not possible? Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Frustration (hüsran) and Chaos! Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Both children want the orange Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson But without good listening, neither gets what they want… Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Communication Communication is the process of sending and receiving information among people… Feedback receiver SENDER sender RECEIVER Source: CGAP Direct Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Messages not delivered due to “distortion” (çarpıtma /bozulma) Feedback Receiver Sender Distortion Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson What causes distortion? Speaker Language Wordiness Semantics Emotions Inflections (tonlama) Listener Boğazıçı University Perceptions (algı) Preconceived (ön yargılı) notions/expectations Physical hearing problem Speed of thought Personal interests Emotions Attention span (dikkat dağınıklığı) Tom Atkinson No active listening! What do you think about? I have something really important to tell you Boğazıçı University Maybe I should get a haircut Tom Atkinson 30% of you aren’t paying attention right now! Clues that you are not listening Are you simply waiting for your turn to talk? Are you thinking about your reply before the other person has finished talking? Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Listening and speaking require energy Listening takes. . . concentration and energy curiosity and open-mindedness analysis and understanding Speaking requires. . . sharp focus logical thinking clear phrasing crisp delivery (Canlı-hareketli konuşma/ifade) Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson How to be an active listener Set the stage Choose an appropriate physical environment Remove distractions Be open and accessible Maintain relaxed, open posture that shows concentration Ensure mutual (karşılıklı) understanding Reflect feelings (duyguları yansıt) Offer acknowledgements (say “uh-huh”) Paraphrase (yorumla) main ideas Interrupt to clarify (? – dikkatli kullanmak lazım!) Confirm next steps Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson How to be an active listener Understand body language Observe position and posturing (poz) Make eye contact Consider expression and gestures Suspend judgment (yargıyı ertele) Concentrate Keep an open mind Hear the person out Do not react to emotive (duygulandırıcı) words Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Active Listening (not!) Behaviors that hinder (mani olan) effective listening Act distracted (look at your watch!) Tell your own story without acknowledging theirs Give no response Invalidate (geçersiz kılmak) response, be negative Interrupt Criticize Diagnose (tanı koymak) what was said Give advice/solutions quickly Change the subject Reassure without acknowledgment (gerçeği kabullenmeden güvenmek) Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Let’s practice Tell the person next to you about your Research Project Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Tell me your stories Do you feel your partner understood you? What made your partner easy/hard to listen to? Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Part 3 Paraphrasing, Summarizing and Questioning Techniques to improve listening skills SUMMARIZE SUMMARIZE PARAPHRASE PARAPHRASE Restate Restatewhat whatwas was said saidin inyour yourown own words words Pull Pulltogether together the themain mainpoints points of ofaaspeaker speaker QUESTION QUESTION Challenge Challengespeaker speaker to tothink thinkfurther, further, clarifying clarifyingboth bothyour your and andtheir their understanding understanding Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Practice Paraphrasing Paraphrasing (izah etmek) is simply restating what another person has said in your own words. Use phrases such as: Boğazıçı University In other words… I gather that… If I understand what you are saying… What I hear you saying is… Pardon my interruption, but let me see if I understand you correctly… Tom Atkinson Practice Summarizing Summarizing pulls important ideas, facts or data together. Useful for emphasizing key points and setting the stage for further discussion. The person summarizing must listen carefully in order to organize the information systematically. Boğazıçı University Try out these summarizing phrases: “If I understand you correctly, your main concerns are…” “These seem to be the key ideas you have expressed… ” Tom Atkinson Two basic types of questions Closed questions: 1. Get a one-word response and inhibit (engellemek) thought. Questions begin with who, when and which Open-ended questions: 2. Invite unique thought, reflection (yansıma) or an explanation. Questions begin with how, what and how come (nasıl oldu) (not why!). Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Practice Questioning Rephrase the following closed questions to make them open-ended: 1. Are you feeling tired? Isn’t it a nice day? Was the last activity useful? Is there anything bothering you? So everything is fine, then? 2. 3. 4. 5. Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Let’s practice Tell the person next to you what you did last weekend Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson Questions? Feedback Give an assessment of today’s session What did you like most and least? Assess the verbal presentation? Assess the slides? How useful do you think this topic will be for future classes on communications? [email protected] Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson
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